Skip to Navigation

A listening conversation is good for your health, wellbeing and sense of identity. It is vital for social cohesion and when you are listening well you are doing something useful for the people you listen to.

I heard someone say, “People are so afraid of talking, really talking to each other”. It’s a view for which I have some sympathy. Most of us talk all the time but say very little.

For general consumption this may be OK; we have neither the time nor the inclination to involve ourselves in a deep and meaningful listening conversation at every turn. Nor would it be appropriate to overshare personal details and viewpoints. There has to be some connection with others though, it’s essential for our sense of identity, wellbeing, and social cohesion.

Connecting with others via purposeful and fulfilling listening conversation is enlivening and intellectually stimulating, and it helps participants’ cognitive functioning too. Quite literally, a meaningful conversation where you feel connected to another helps you think better.

How to connect

You know you are really having a connected conversation when, as I say, ‘the room disappears’; you become so focused on the conversation that you are only peripherally aware of your surroundings.

Talking about ourselves isn’t taboo. It doesn’t have to be ‘me-me-me. We may be living in a culture that idolises and aspires to celebrity, against a backdrop of social media twittering, but that’s just wallpaper (maybe just papering over the cracks in some cases).

Real people (men and women) do real conversation. Real conversations involve people talking about important stuff, learning about each other, sharing ideas, and above all, listening. One of the most useful things you can do for another person, I believe, is to really listen and ask them intelligent, probing questions. Ideally, these should take them down a track they haven’t been down before.

By the way, a good question goes on working long after you have asked it, so it shouldn’t necessarily require an answer.

I’ve been rooting around in the archives recently, and I’ve re-jigged my listening download. I will locate the one on questions and make that available too.

Free download, please enter your name and email

Simply enter your name and email and you'll get your download right away. Your information will only ever be used by us, and you can unsubscribe at any time.


One Response to “Listening Conversation”

  1. Listening is a skill and sometimes takes years of experience. Lots of patience is needed. Like a recipe all ingredients are needed to complete a good out come, leave out a ingredient then the recipe will fail. Everyone has a voice and a Voice needed to be heard. It’s amazing what can be achieved just by being a silent listener. Communication is a great healer for any person who just wants to off load. So Godbless all the Ears who have given their time up to share in someone’s life in some way☺️👂


What do you think? Share your thoughts...

Latest from the blog

Too Much Expected of You? Overwhelmed?

We are living in what is probably the richest period of human history, at least in the developed world. By ‘rich’ I mean we have access to more information, more wealth, more variety, more possibility… than we have ever had. This applies to everything, not just good stuff. So, it appears, we also have more […]

Continue reading

Find a Sacred Place – 2

In an earlier post I wrote about finding a ‘sacred place’. There have been some questions about what I meant by ‘sacred place’.

Maybe this will clarify things a bit. Dictionary definitions seem to equate sacred with religious, and so does St. Google. I mean something different.

Continue reading
FREE DOWNLOAD - Get it now.

How to be more Resilient

Get my super-helpful guide '9 Steps to Resilience' absolutely FREE, when you subscribe to my newsletter.

Understand the steps to resilience and you can develop the ability to cope with problems and setbacks with less stress and more confidence.
%d bloggers like this: