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It is not good use of anyone’s time to hang around with someone you don’t like, in fact it can really bring you down. If that someone is yourself it can be lonely and isolating.

According to a study I read recently over 80% of people with depression express self-dislike. They also see themselves as lacking the qualities they most admire in others, qualities like intelligence, popularity, health and achievement.

I wonder if kids could teach us something here. When we are young we use our imagination as a refuge, and fantasy as a learning and development tool. We create imaginary scenarios and live out adventures where we succeed in acts of creativity, bravery and even heroism. Once we are grown up we tend to write this off, and we certainly undervalue it.

People who think bad things about themselves are simply doing the reverse. They are using their imagination to create self-limiting and damaging scenarios that are no more realistic than our dragon-slaying fantasies are when we are kids.

It’s OK to fantisise about who you are or want to become. it is also exercise for the mind and a refuge from the other false reality of self-defeating negative beliefs.

I know which I choose.

 

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