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Researching a new book on brief therapy I have been struck once again by how much work has been done on understanding what helps people with change in their lives. The information is out there, but for the most part we ignore it.

Instead of looking at what works – what has helped someone change or adapt to change in the past, for example – we all too often tend to do more of the same. Repeating our failed attempts simply reinforces our sense of powerlessness in relation to the problem. This is doubly damaging when our job is to help others change and our strategies involve setting them up for failure.

However well we know them, it is useful to revisit the simple rules:

  • Find out what works and do more of it.
  • If it’s not working do something different.

Buy the book:

Solution Focused Therapy for the Helping Professions.

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Never Mind What Others Think

what others think

Even though we don’t realise it when we say we know what someone thinks about something, we are guessing. Even mind-reading – in a fairground or on stage – is trickery.

Yet we often allow our own thoughts and behaviour to be goverened by what we claim someone else will think. Maybe it’s time to review what we ‘know’.

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One thing better

Getting things done is not half as satisfying as doing things well. This is because we get personal satisfaction from giving something all our attention, doing it to the best of our abilities, being absorbed in it while we are doing it, and looking back with pride at a job well done.
“Enough time” has nothing to do with it, as you’ll see.

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