flip-side, it's not easy

Quite a lot of people think that it does. Or, at least they act as if they do.

It’s not easy to grow from the past. Some people do, successfully, by learning and changing. Others do the opposite; they use the past as an excuse not to change.

It’s a personal choice: to learn and change or to stay stuck with habits or problems which are inconvenient to yourself or other people.

Deep roots

It goes deep, this idea that we can’t escape our history. But it’s not ‘escaping’ that I’m on about here, I’m saying there’s no need to use the past as an excuse for what you are when what you are is not what you want to be.

Accepting history, moving on, or even using it as a springboard to get ahead, is another matter. That can be tough, sometimes. It means first accepting, looking yourself in the face, understanding yourself with compassion. It also takes a little courage.

Moving on

Back to the title. Your personal history doesn’t necessarily have to mean you are misshapen, damaged, a failure, unhappy, or incomplete in some way. Neither does it mean you have to feel ashamed, embarrassed, undeserving, nor disadvantaged.

Past experience can inform the present and help you with creating the future. For that to happen though you have to be able to learn from it – and that’s not always easy.

I’m a psychologist, coach, and therapist. All my work is aimed at enabling people to improve personal aspects of their lives and work.


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