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Choice is Empowering

Being ‘spoilt for choice’ is a nicer problem to have than feeling trapped by circumstance.

If you are unfortunate enough to find yourself in a situation you feel helpless to change, creating a range of options can be empowering, without having to actually do anything else.

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Fix a problem? The Cause Is No Solution

fix a problem

Looking back is easy, but it can be an ill-informed and lazy habit. Or a cop-out, or an excuse for doing nothing. Problem solving always happens after now, so look to the future and stop grubbing about in the past.

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You Can’t Change Change

change, mid-course correction

To paraphrase Heraclitus: “You can’t step into the same stream twice”.

Change is constant and you’ll be different this evening from how you were this morning.

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Solving problems in life

Struggle is self-reinforcing, so if you are struggling with something the chances are you are unwittingly maintaining the thing you are struggling with.This is not to say that you have created the problem, or that there is somehow ‘fault’ involved, or that you meant it to be that way. It is just that our efforts […]

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Communication Breakdown? Really?

communication breakdown

There is no such thing as a ‘communication breakdown’.

We here about it all time time, but I think this is a an inaccurate and limiting term which does more harm than good. Here’s why.

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Don’t Try to Stop Guilt and Shame – Just Free Yourself

Guilt course

Guilt can be perverse and insistent. Perverse because it can hang around long after it has done it’s job, and insistent because it keeps knocking long after you’ve not only heard it, you’ve let it in and got the message.

On occasions it also persuades you that we have to put up with it, but you don’t.

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Misunderstandings that Limit Opportunity

We all face problems but that doesn’t mean we are stupid, weak or crazy. The right professional help can open up possibilities.

Common misconceptions about therapy mean that many people suffer when they needn’t.

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Just Because You Can…

…it doesn’t mean you have to. Being able to do something doesn’t automatically make us obliged to do it. This is often the reason people over-commit by agreeing to do too many things, or try to help others who would rather not be helped for example. It can equally be applied in personal habits. In […]

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