It is important to be able to forgive. If you can do it, you have a choice – to offer forgiveness or not – but many people fall at the first hurdle because of a misunderstanding. Or should I say, a single omission.
Most people adjust to the 'new reality' eventually, when children are involved we have an obligation to do it sooner, rather than later. It's curious, that when grown-ups are angry they are told they are acting like children, and when children are angry, they are often told to "grow up." Dealing with the emotional aftermath of separation or divorce is unfathomably difficult, but however tough it is, part of the parental contract means that we will sometimes need to act like responsible adults, even though we don't want to.
Relationships are fraught with uncertainty and a good one can be elusive. What are the choices? Keep searching, or work with what you've got?