When problem-talk becomes a central feature in someone’s narrative it can have a pervasive and nagging effect that with time begins to define who they are and how they experience life.

By talking about only what is wrong a person can start to take a passive and dependent role, relying more on fate than on their own ability to take control of their life.

There is a well established link between wellbeing and how we explain events to ourselves (psychologists call it explanatory style). We all like a bit of a moan sometimes, but if it becomes a pervasive theme it is toxic to the human spirit.

The good news is that we can train ourselves out of it. Watch this space.

I’m a psychologist, coach, and therapist. All my work is aimed at enabling people to improve personal aspects of their lives and work.

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"Train your mind to look for your successes. They are happening all the time, you just have to look for them."
"We only develop greater resilience when we are deeply emotionally connected to other people."
"If you think you can, or you think you can't, you're probably right".
"Just because you can, it doesn't mean you should, nor that you have to".
"Simplify your life and work to be content. That will create the space for you to notice the joy. It's always there if you look."
“Personal Change Begins In The Imagination. You Have To Imagine It Before You Can Become It, Whatever ‘It’ Is”