Optimism is a Natural Trait, Even If There’s Plenty to be Miserable About

Optimism comes naturally to some people. They wake up expecting things to work out, and more often than not, they do. If that is not you, do not despair. Ironically, despair is the flip side of optimism, which means there is room to flip the coin. Mood, outlook, and attitude are far more flexible than we tend to believe, and there is a great deal you can do to influence them.

Optimism is not naïve, and it is not about pretending everything is fine. It is a skill, a stance, and a daily choice that can protect your wellbeing and help you bounce back when life gets rough.

I am not suggesting that we ignore reality. There is plenty of bad news out there, and no shortage of things to worry about. I am well aware of that, and I am not burying my head in the sand. What I am suggesting is that we get more deliberate about what we consume and how much of it we allow into our lives. I prefer to choose my own daily disaster diet, so I do not end up overloaded, anxious, and drained before the day has properly begun.

Keep it simple

There is a simple idea that sits at the heart of this. That which we focus on becomes our reality. What we attend to, how we interpret events, and the judgments we make about ourselves and the world all shape our lived experience. This is not always easy to manage, because intrusive and unnecessary thoughts can turn up at any time, uninvited and unhelpful. Anyone who has tried to control their thinking knows this.

Over time, I have become reasonably good at patrolling my mental boundaries and protecting my outlook. That said, this is not something that happens by itself. Even the most resilient people have to work at it. Resilience is not a personality trait that you either have or you do not, it is a state that needs maintaining. If you want to be able to bounce back, you need to keep yourself in a condition where bouncing back is possible.

Ups and downs

Like everyone else, I have off days. I have had periods, sometimes strings of days, where I slipped into what I bluntly call a life’s a mess and then you die kind of hopelessness. I also know depression from the inside. I spent many years dipping in and out of that state from my teenage years and well into adulthood. Optimism did not rescue me magically. What helped was learning how to work with my mind rather than being dragged around by it.

This brings me to a divisive idea. I think of myself as optimistic and generally happy, although my face does not always support this claim, and people who know me well might raise an eyebrow. Some of this is temperament, but a lot of it has been learned and practiced. Staying on the helpful side of the positive and negative divide is a choice, and it is a choice that requires care and consistency.

In my experience, people with a sunny disposition are usually fairly harmless in their opinions. It can be irritating to hear that things will work out, or that there is a silver lining somewhere, especially when you are struggling. Still, it rarely ruins your day to be told this, even if you do not buy into it.

The same cannot always be said for those who trade in doom and gloom. Scaremongers who broadcast their worst case scenarios can genuinely bring you down. Even if you do not agree with their predictions, some of it sticks. You carry it with you, and it quietly colours your thinking.

There is another difference worth noting. If you disagree with an optimist, they tend to shrug and move on to someone else. Challenge a pessimist, and things can get tense. You may be accused of denial, ignorance, or refusing to face reality. This is why optimism can feel like a political stance rather than a personal one. It divides people.

An essential life skill

Despite this, there are strong reasons to treat optimism as a core wellbeing skill. It supports mental health, encourages problem solving, and makes setbacks easier to tolerate. It does not mean being unrealistic, it means being intentional.

If you want practical guidance, I have published a ten page self training guide called *How To Practice Optimism* as part of my LifeHack series. It is designed to help you train this outlook, step by step, and make it part of how you live, not just how you think on a good day

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