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If you are having a stressful day there is a lot you can do to help yourself. People who deal well with stress have certain characteristics which set them apart. These factors add up to what’s known as resilience, and they can be learned and developed. 

For highly resilient people, these ways of thinking and responding are automatic, (that’s why they are habits). Even if you haven’t reached that point yet, you can use these tactics to get you through a difficult situation. You’ll prevent the stress from getting to you, master your responses, and act strategically by setting goals and moving towards them.

You may not consider yourself highly resilient yet, but you can still use these tactics to get you through a difficult situation and to prevent the stress from getting to you.

Resilient people are able to control their emotional responses and behaviour. They are also have insight into the reactions of the people around them. They experience the same ups and downs as the rest of us, but they are able to function well under pressure because of the way they have of embracing a situation and making choices about it.

Find something you can control (even if it’s small)

Highly resilient people are proactive in the face of high demand rather than feeling angry or intimidated by it.  Taking control of something helps counter a sense of helplessness when things threaten to overwhelm us. Break the situation or problem down and tackle one bit at a time.

Do a reality check

Check your thinking for accuracy. We make hasty and irrational judgements, especially when we are stressed. These are usually scary and make any situation seem worse than it is. They distort out thinking and can quickly overwhelm us.

Adopt a learning attitude

Resilient people learn from successes, from other people, from life itself. And they learn from their failures. Also, seeing failure from a learning perspective takes some of the sting out of it.

Ask others to help

Resilient people feel that they are connected with, supported, and understood by others. They know that they sometimes have to reach out and ask.

“It is what it is”

Being accepting of circumstances allows you to direct your energy towards goals and solutions. Refusing to accept is simply fighting with reality, it’s tiring and you won’t win.

Stay connected

Hone your social skills. The quality of relationships, both professional and personal, is an important factor in developing and maintaining a resilient outlook. This also helps with your self-esteem.

Distract yourself

Doing things you enjoy and focussing on your successes can be affirming and will bolster your energies. Don’t wait until you have time; resilient people make the time for what they enjoy.

Resilient people understand that they need to take care of themselves emotionally and physically. Resilience is built on learnable skills but just knowing about these skills isn’t enough. You need to think about them, understand them and practice them until they become habits. Then you can join the ranks of highly resilient people.

Emotional Intelligence – What It Is and Why it Matters

Five Habits for Emotional and Psychological Wellbeing (EPW)

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