Skip to Navigation

Certainty is a comfortable feeling, but when it becomes an automatic response it is risky, and threatening to harmony. Because we are generally uncomfortable with doubt and ambiguity, it can become a reflex to reduce uncertainty by claiming to know something even when we don’t.

This shows up most clearly when we work or live with someone who is ‘always right’. In extreme cases this sets up a tension in the relationship that becomes an obstruction to mutual respect and understanding.

We are all capable of slipping into a mode where we express certainty about things we are not actually sure of. A subtle and unconscious drift that lures us into a habit of ‘knowing’, while simultaneously driving others away from complicity with us.

The antidote to this is to practice a simple phrase regularly and often. “I don’t know” has a liberating effect which is far greater than it’s simplicity suggests.

What do you think? Share your thoughts...

Latest from the blog

Never Mind What Others Think

what others think

Even though we don’t realise it when we say we know what someone thinks about something, we are guessing. Even mind-reading – in a fairground or on stage – is trickery.

Yet we often allow our own thoughts and behaviour to be goverened by what we claim someone else will think. Maybe it’s time to review what we ‘know’.

Continue reading

One thing better

Getting things done is not half as satisfying as doing things well. This is because we get personal satisfaction from giving something all our attention, doing it to the best of our abilities, being absorbed in it while we are doing it, and looking back with pride at a job well done.
“Enough time” has nothing to do with it, as you’ll see.

Continue reading
%d bloggers like this: